Self Care
“Take care of yourself so that you are better equipped to take care of others”…..
The old adage, “Health is Wealth”, never gets old, right? What’s the use in growing financially, crushing your life goals, and leveling up overall— if you won’t be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor because your health is failing??
As I do a new vision board, the goal of self-care, continuously carries over from year to year. I personally didn’t see much self-care from the women in my family. They gave of themselves constantly to their jobs, men, family, and church. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nothing wrong with doing these things, their mistake was not pouring into themselves enough. I, in turn, grew up putting myself on the back burner as a norm.
I had no idea that I wasn’t caring for myself properly. That concept was foreign to me. I didn’t know how to say no. I found it hard to stick up for myself. I didn’t know how to take a compliment. I was in unhealthy relationships. This went on for years. It was time to re-evaluate.
Eventually, I learned that self-care equates to self-love! Self-care is necessary and vital to a well-balanced happy existence. I came to this realization after having my second kid. My cup was not only empty but DRY, honey! I was literally running on fumes. I had this new baby and a very small support system. I wasn’t getting any sleep. I was losing weight drastically due to stress. But, It was extremely important for me to be a great mother to my kids so I knew it had to be a better way. Under no circumstance could they grow up like I did. So, I had some major changes to make.
I rarely did anything for myself outside of the necessities but I realized that not only was I doing a disservice to myself but also to my family. I was unhappy and feelings of depression and exhaustion haunted me. I began to make slow but intentional changes with my health and self-care. I began pouring into myself and became a much happier person as a result.
What does self-care look like for me?
Learn Something New - I enrolled myself in a couple of classes. Adding something else to my already full plate was stressful but these classes eventually helped me land a new job making more money. This could also help you find a new hobby.
Nail Spa - I began getting manicures and pedicures regularly. This served as quiet time for me away from my little loves. It gave me a confidence boost, as well.
Reading - Prior to having children, I used to read 1-2 books a month. I want to get back to that but it’s so hard. It now takes me at least a month to read one book but audiobooks have helped tremendously.
Pamper Nights - Because I can’t always afford to go to the spa, once a week while my kids are sleep, I usually take a long relaxing bath, give myself a facial, use my body scrubs, play a little music, and lather myself in my best serums and body butters. As I get older, it’s become increasingly more important to take care of my skin. These nights help tremendously!
Catch a Movie or a Concert- My absolute favorite thing to do is watch movies and go to concerts. A good movie can transport you and good music is like therapy to the soul!
Get Out - be it with friends or family, schedule some time to go out and have some fun. A few ideas on things you could do are dinners, shopping, ladies’ nights, date nights, or game nights. These all help you in getting back to your old self, unwinding and bringing balance to the everyday grind.
Working Out - reduces my stress and I literally forget about my concerns for at least an hour. I leave feeling refreshed and renewed. My ultimate goal for working out is to lose weight but it also works wonders for me mentally (praise him). It’s literally like therapy for a sister!
Massages - I literally forget what’s going on in the world while I’m on that table. It’s the ultimate me time🙌🏾! If you can afford a membership, getting massages monthly could do wonders for your body as well as providing a much needed escape for an hour or 90 minutes. Even, every other month could make a difference!
Say Yes to Help - We are all Super Women, but you have to know it’s ok to accept help from family and friends. Please stop trying to do it all on your own. If it lightens your load, gives you a break, or a breather then rest that cape for a few, Sis! Stress is not your friend!
Once I began incorporating these self-care practices, it taught me to start taking better care of myself and the quality of my life improved both mentally and physically. That could be taking a day off work without alerting your immediate family, I like to call these mental health days. It could be a Netflix and chill day or, take an hour or two and go to Starbucks and enjoy your favorite beverage while getting lost in a new book. You don’t always have to spend a whole bunch of money, but more expensive options would be to take a vacation out of your city, a staycation right in your own city for a day, or treat yourself to a weekend getaway at a nearby bed and breakfast!
I implore you to find some time to do something for you. You can’t live for everyone else. Choose yourself for a change. This may seem selfish but actually it’s not. When you’re happy and full spiritually, the rest of the house runs smoothly. Your energy becomes more vibrant. You’ll smile more and overall feel good about yourself.
Make 2020 the year of no regrets!!
